Sustainable Change and Curiosity

Small Experiments/Big Commitments

When something matters deeply to us—when it’s tied to our values or a sense of purpose—it can feel risky to act at all. The weight of meaning turns simple steps into defining moments, and suddenly movement feels heavier than stillness. Not because we lack motivation, but because we don’t want to extinguish the very fire that brought us here in the first place.

As I began learning the foundations of Health and Wellness Coaching, the spirit of motivational interviewing, and the overall philosophy of supporting healthy behavior change, I noticed a shift in myself. As I went about my days thinking, how would a health coach respond?, the voice in my head slowly became that of a wellness coach. My self-talk became more compassionate and less judgmental. I began to see my mind and thoughts as partner to my body and outer world. I noticed moments of challenge through a lens of curiosity rather than failure.

The lens of curiosity was, and still is, fundamental in keeping me in forward motion. Not in a “go without stopping” sort of way (after all, we’ve already discussed the importance of a pause), but in keeping my inner flame steadily burning. Staying curious is like keeping the ember lit—giving breath or fuel as needed. It’s a mindset shift back to the original question, what do I want? And within that mindset, there is always room to explore. When you allow yourself to become curious, you raise your thought process to a level of creativity and innovation. This open-mindedness brings awareness to opportunities and solutions we don’t always see from a critical angle.

When making identity-level decisions, there is often pressure to “choose right” because it feels like our forever is involved. This pressure to get it right can easily lead to all-or-nothing thinking, which stalls momentum as if blowing out a candle. It’s a distorted way of thinking—that you must get it right, choose the best option, or else you’re a failure. Do you read how that sounds? Totally ridiculous, but we do it all the time. It truly is a practice to catch yourself in those moments and reframe for a more curious view instead. I myself am still working on this as I go.

In deciding on a name for this site, how I wanted it to look, and what image I wanted to portray, every decision felt so overwhelming that it almost didn’t happen. In fact, I think I’d still be in a contemplative state if it weren’t for the coaching principles I was learning along the way. That, and someone saying to me, “It’s never going to feel perfect or good enough. You just have to go for it.” I love that because it applies to everything. The pressure we put on ourselves because of how important our purpose is to us somehow translates into such high stakes that we feel we have to do it perfectly—or not at all.

Deciding to change something for yourself is not something you can fail or pass. It is an ever-evolving path that you’re already halfway down simply by pursuing change in the first place. And it’s often at this halfway point that those all-or-nothing thoughts show up. We begin to see goals tied to our purpose as identity-defining commitments that require heavy discipline to achieve. Caught up in critical thinking, we turn molehills into mountains and barriers. But what if they weren’t mountains or molehills? What if we saw them as experiments instead?

An experiment doesn’t require much. It doesn’t ask you to decide who you are, what you believe, or where you’re headed. They’re temporary by design, simply creating a container for you to notice what happens. Not to judge outcomes or force willpower. Experiments gather information rather than demand performance. And because of that, they tend to feel safer to the body, even when they’re meaningful. The important distinction here is that commitment asks for faith in an outcome, while experimentation asks for curiosity about a response.

When we turn our commitments into small experiments, our actions become responsive. The focus isn’t on results, productivity, or optimization. It’s on noticing what feels steady, what feels draining, what invites more presence, and what quietly asks for less. Over time, these small acts of noticing build trust within ourselves. Not because everything works, but because nothing is wasted when we are curious and learning. Movement stops being a test of worth or discipline and becomes a dialogue between intention and experience.

This is often how sustainable change actually unfolds. Not through sweeping decisions or rigid plans, but through a series of small, honest trials that allow us to stay connected to ourselves while we move. The path reveals itself not all at once, but through feedback. Through what the body, mind, and nervous system respond to as we go and then making adjustments accordingly.

Too much pressure, even in the name of meaning, can smother our fire. Curiosity creates space for learning without demands and within that space we can conduct small experiments which allow our purpose to breathe.

You don’t have to decide anything forever to move forward. You don’t have to prove your commitment or justify your direction. Sometimes the most sustainable form of change begins as a question rather than a promise—a small, honest experiment that allows you to listen while you move. Over time, it’s this willingness to try, notice, and adjust that keeps the inner fire alive—not by demanding more from it, but by letting it breathe.

Experiments protect what matters by keeping change responsive instead of rigid.